© David Clutterbuck, 2016...
A common occurrence in coaching and mentoring is that, after the first flush of enthusiasm, the relationship begins to run out of steam. Both parties are reluctant to take each other’s time, when there appear to be no urgent or significant things to talk about. The initial sense of purpose becomes dulled. Managed effectively, this...
Scaling is a technique for helping someone quantify a goal and how they are working towards it. The basic question is always, “On a scale of 1 to 10, where do you think you are and where do you want to be?” This can apply to performance, a change in situation, or emotions. So a...
The guru of self-coaching is Australian Anthony Grant, who suggests a 12-step approach to applying coaching methods to one’s own issues. Step 1 is to create an irritations inventory – things that you don’t enjoy, make your life uncomfortable, or that you’ve learned to tolerate but would rather do without. Classify them under headings such...
Having a sense of purpose for the mentoring relationship is essential for focusing the conversations and for maintaining momentum. However, having a very specific goal at the beginning is not necessarily helpful – indeed, it can be harmful! The reasons for this are: Mentees and coachees often bring goals, which are imposed on them, rather (more…)
Being an effective mentor requires a continuously expanding portfolio of MDQs – (Massively Difficult Questions). These are what stimulate the mentee to reflect and gain personal insight. Equally important, however, are the MDQs we ask ourselves. For example: For whose benefit am I asking this question? Can I do more here by saying nothing? What...
Sponsoring in an interesting term; research suggests that in the workplace sponsors are as important, if not more so, than mentors. Sponsorship mentor owes its origins to practice in US companies in the late 1970s and early 1980s. Mentoring was then described as “overseeing the career of a young man”. Researcher Kathy Kram, now a...
The Stepping In, Stepping Out technique can be very powerful. Here’s some instructions and some sample questions. SISO is best used as an automatic response to “stuckness” in a client. The starting point is Which quadrant is the client caught in? Once you are clear where they are, join them in that quadrant, formulating questions...
Summarising is one of the key learning processes of a learning conversation strategies a mentor needs to develop and is a crucial part of any mentoring conversation for several reasons. It provides an opportunity to: The point of summarising is not just to condense what has been said. It is just as important as a (more…)
In meetings, people often take copious notes. The problem is that the more notes you take, the less you attend. Our brains don’t have dedicated circuits for writing, so they have to cannibalise circuits that would otherwise be used for listening. Coaching and mentoring require intense listening skills and mindfulness. The coach or mentor needs (more…)