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One of the reasons people find a mentor so valuable is that we all need from time to time to open our hearts out to someone we trust. However, research at Duke University reports that the average number of people, who an individual might trust with deep confidences has declined rapidly from three in 1985...
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A critical friend is a trusted person, who is able to offer critique through open dialogue. The critical friend may say things that colleagues are reluctant to say, ask questions colleagues are reluctant to ask and view situations from different perspectives. For the process to work effectively, the coachee or mentee needs to view and...
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One of the attractions of a mentor for a mentee is that they have different and sometimes more influential networks. However, experience shows that selecting a mentor primarily for their contacts does not create a healthy basis for learning relationship. Mentors in this situation report feeling “used” and the relationships tend to be very transactional....
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The earliest studies of mentoring found that mentees typically used their mentors as role models, although this was rarely a conscious behaviour. And the larger the power distance between mentor and mentee (or protégé), the greater the amount of role modelling that took place. Consciously or unconsciously, the mentee absorbs from their mentor behaviours, ways...
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The mentor as sounding board A mentor can be a sounding board; the mentor can give advice about situations and scenarios. Being a sounding board involves a shift in the dynamics of the learning conversation. The very act of offering an opinion on the mentee’s intended actions transfers some of the ownership of the issue...
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Phases of the mentoring relationship Mentoring relationships last for various lengths of time – more formal programmes will often set a time frame – for example 12 months. Less formal programmes may just allow relationships to continue as agreed by the individuals. However, research into large numbers of mentoring pairs has established that effective mentoring...
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We are all part of multiple networks in the workplace. There are two main kinds of network: influence (getting things done) and information (finding things out). Networks may also be internal (connecting you within your team or department) or external (connecting you with people in other departments or outside the organization altogether). It’s useful for...
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Observation is an essential coaching / mentoring skill; high quality feedback depends on high quality observation. A good coach / mentor uses the interactions, behaviours and actions to provide data that informs feedback. There are a number of key components to factors in the observation process: genuine, relevant, empathy, accuracy and timely. If a coach...
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Developmental mentoring does not have to be between people of different authority levels, although sponsorship mentoring typically relies upon a power and influence differential as a driving mechanism of the relationship. Peer mentoring allows the relationship to focus closely on mutual learning and mutual support. The lack of status helps build and maintain rapport, to...
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In working through personal reflective space, whether alone or with a coach or mentor, the quality of dialogue is critical. The type of questions used, their relevance and their capacity to stimulate reflection and understanding, are all important. So, too, is the nature and depth of reflection – in particular, how well intellectual analysis and...
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