Working coaches, mentors, supervisors; mid-career
The drama triangle is a useful model from transactional analysis. It depicts the interplay of power and responsibility between people. In the drama triangle there are three roles: When someone asks for help, they can easily fall into the victim role. Anyone who agrees to help becomes a rescuer, but if they are tired of...
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Emotional mapping is particularly useful in helping a client work through the mix of emotions they are feeling about an issue. It’s rare for a strong emotional reaction to consist of just one emotion, but people tend only to be aware of the most powerful emotions that possess them. Identifying other component emotions can: The...
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At the end of the coaching / mentoring session, the learner should leave with a sense of: The coach or mentor should leave with a sense of: All of these outcomes can be enhanced by ensuring that the final few minutes of the session review questions such as: A pitfall the coach or mentor can...
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Framing refers to how we create meaning and how that influences how we behave. So, for example, being unsuccessful in a job interview might lead you to feel depressed and unworthy. WE have framed the experience so we view it from that perspective and don’t perceive others. But we can choose how we feel and...
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This technique is based on research from Stanford University and elsewhere that suggests a powerful connection between how closely people identify with their future self and how motivated they are to take actions, which invest in their future. Halk Ersner-Hershfield and Brian Knutson found that the rostral anterior cingulated cortex in the brain is activated...
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Scripting is a technique, which helps people bring about change in a conversation or situation that always seems to go predictably wrong – where they find themselves trapped in an exchange, knowing where it is going, but unable to stop it. (Typical examples are arguments with teenage children, or feeling unable to make one’s presence...
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Coaching and mentoring some people can be hard work, but it can be rewarding, because it provides a useful opportunity to expand your skills in developmental dialogue. Some of the most common situations that you might meet include: A three-stage process Our instinctive response is often to feel irritation at the other person’s unreasonableness. That’s...
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Through research and our own experience as working parents, we have identified a number of distinct stages in the journey to working parenthood which are concerned with; Stage 1 – Early pregnancy What’s happening for the mentee The very early days of pregnancy are characterised by a spirit of simple pragmatism: ‘keep calm and carry...
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Learning is at the heart of any coaching and mentoring relationship. We learn in different ways, through different methods and at different times. Once common factor amongst all individuals is that they all make mistakes and mistakes can be a valuable source of learning. If we accept that mistakes are a valuable source of learning,...
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The authors of the book Difficult Conversations point out that, when we feel constrained from saying exactly what we think, it is the gap between what we are really thinking and what we say that makes a difficult conversation difficult. In essence, we are trying to have two conversations at once. Each difficult conversation is...
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